First Day of Speech and Language Therapy

At first we thought that Caleb's Speech and Language Therapy was going to be postponed again because of the snow, but luckily I got a call this morning saying that even though the center was closed for part of the morning, Caleb could get an 11am slot with his therapist!  I happily agreed and snatched up that slot immediately.

Caleb's therapist is seriously adorable; I can see why kids like her.  She is in her 30's and is around 5 feet tall and maybe 100 lbs.  She looks like a big kid herself.  Caleb took to her immediately.  She explained to me that during the first session they basically get to know each other and figure out where Caleb is at developmentally.  I got to watch behind a 2 way mirror - it was strange watching someone else interact with Caleb.  I found myself silently rooting for him - beaming when he would stack the rings correctly or direct the therapist with his hands while grimacing when he would put the stacking cups in his mouth instead of one on top of the other.  30 minutes flew by, and afterwards Caleb's therapist told me her impressions. 

Basically, her initial impression was that Caleb is at the mild end of Autism.  He is a happy boy who wants to play and learn.  He also did very well physically directing the therapist to what he wanted, such as putting a balloon in her hand and then putting her hand on the air pump that blows up the balloon. 

For the first time in a long time, I feel like a good parent.  I have worked very hard to get Caleb to use physical indicators to show what he wants.  For example, I hold up two food items and he needs to indicate which one he wants in order to eat one.  This uses his drive of hunger and the reward of food as a powerful motivator.  I also do it during play, letting him direct me.  I find that if I am quiet and let him lead, he will tell me what he wants by moving my hands or putting items in my hands.  This is a behavior that I have worked on and encouraged through hours and hours of mutual play.  I honestly sit on the floor and play with him for hours each day.  And for so long I have felt like I have been failing or what I have been doing isn't enough.  But now it seems that maybe I have been doing something that actually matters, and for me that is amazing.

I am also super relieved that Caleb's therapist thinks that his Autism is mild.  I have been searching other blogs about Autism, and frankly, a lot of it scares me.  I read this moving piece about this father who had to put his violent child in an institution.  The institution ended up being the best thing for both the son and the family, but Caleb is my only child, and I cannot have any more kids.  The idea of my only child being institutionalized breaks me down to tears.  I hope that Caleb never gets violent.  I hope that Caleb has a normal life.  And while, yes, it is most important the Caleb has a happy life, I still want him to be successful in the traditional sense of society.  I am not quite ready to change my dreams of that yet.